The five people you see at every concert

I spend a lot of time going to shows at some of the old, shitty/awesome venues in Atlanta.

  1. The guy who is drunk, sweating profusely, and seconds away from vomiting on you before the headliner even goes on.
  2. The girl who is having way more fun than you will ever have in your entire life; it’s almost a bummer to stand next to her. Seriously, you’ll be lucky to even approach this level of enthusiasm for the birth of your first child. (Drugs have absolutely nothing to do with it, I’m sure).
  3. The angry girlfriend. She doesn’t want him to have fun without her, but she is hating every second of this. She always has to pee when they play your favorite song and *no*, she cannot go by herself, what if someone tries to molest her in this disgusting place.
  4. The guy who knows every single word to every single song as well as their set list for the show. He is wearing band merch, never without a full PBR, and cannot physically get close enough to the stage. Bonus: He is always at least a foot taller than you.
  5. The girl who is trying way too hard to prove that she is one of the guys. She crowd surfs, pounds cheap beer, and is wearing practically no clothes.

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